Mood swings......

I cant figure out whats missing in my life or me.....
My mood swings have taken a toll on me....
I dnt knw y I feel low all of a sudden..y dissapointment seeps in real fast....
Nothing seems to be helping...moments of joy seem 2 run by quick.... n d feeling of cumin bk 2 my reality sets d depression back....

May be its Rahul... bt I knw deep down that its nt gonna work out and still sumwhr I m still waiting 4 him.... whenever im in a bad mood I can only think of him.... I dnt knw wt I want......

I just hate the feeling of feelin low so often.....
Ive lost who I was... Im different now...
I want to be happy internally....
I just need it badly.... its pushing me deep into a kind of a depression that onsets every now and then.....
Life is peaceful.... bt nt happy!
Uggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhh............

Belief reinforced

It is always said that one person knows himself or herself the best. I thot so too but lately my belief in myself was being shaken by people around me. Bt sumwhere deep down I knew myself n knew I was a gud person. My belief in myself was reinforced when I went to a pandit and after seeing my patri the first thing he said was that 'I am a gud person'. My sense of happiness were beyond boundaries. A feelin of satisfaction and relief filled my heart. Im glad..... n truly happy!!!!!!!!

Nothing is stagnant in life....

Im just beginning to comprehnd that nthng is stagnant in life...
Life changes..situations change and so do people....
Ive had best of my moments with Shreedhara, Swati, Surbhi n Rahul... n now all of them seem distant...swati so does nt matter anymre 2 me.... bt the others do... bt i still cant figure wt place I wanna give 2 them inmy life now....

Life was so much simpler and fun when v r younger..yearning 2 grow up nt realising what v were headin towards...nw v just cry 2 go bk 2 younger days n change sooooo many things that have taken place in life...

I figure myself as a gud person..i knw im a gud person within... I have never done anythng bad 2 any1 intentionally.... I have been so weak as a person. Ive trusted ppl blindly and they have always hurt me... and dis is just the quality in me that has caused me most pain....so now dont knw if its a qulaity or a weakness... Ive been put in situations where I have been proved wrong when i wasnt coz no1 understood me and my position...

When ppl try to be nice 2 u, u r made 2 believe that thy are and you put in ur trust in them.... I just wanna move on in life..away from all of such people here...

im now starting to think whether am a gud person or a bad one?? Still seeking the answer and trying to figure out if what I believe is right or wrong?

Life is complicated and so r d answers v seek!

Life!!

Life isnt always abt wt v want.... Our minds are always racing to plan what we want and how we want them for us..... Even the slihtes second that I get I start planing what I want in life....who I want in my life and who I dont... things i want to do and those which I do bt dnt want to...

People always say that the decisons we take are the ones that we wanted to take... well its nt true... there r so many factors that influence your decisions... I feel my life has always been governed by decisions taken by others for me or how they wanted me to be...


I feel empty within....I long to live the life I want to for myself...It may not be perfect but atleast I would be happy... Would rather live that way than live every single day with regret for hell a lot of decisions that Ive taken in life...Im just nt happy... feel like i ll drive myself into depression and just nt want to nthng around seems to give me happiness anymore...no1 arnd makes any difference to my life....even the ones closest to me (Except a few)...

I just wonder to myself if I will ever be happy?? When will I start to live for myself..the way I want to... Will that day ever come??